The other day, Gabby was visiting and in a terrible mood. Lindy was holding her, but she was still fussing and being all-around grumpy to the rest of us. She didn’t want anything to do with me, my mom or her mom.
Then, Zach, her arch-nemesis walked by, “Zach,” she yelled, though it sounds more like “Aack.” He didn’t listen, so she shouted at him again. She crawled off her mom’s lap and walked over to Zach, standing in front of him and rubbing her eyes. He looked a little bit scared and said, “What do I do … ?” “Um, pick her up,” the three of us replied. So he did, and for the first time in 18-months, Gabby hung out with, snuggled and enjoyed Zach’s company — just in time for us to leave.
We don’t want to be in this picture or your stupid wedding.
We’re leaving in just a few days, off on a small road trip and up to Seattle. Like I said in the last post, some days I’m not ready and it doesn’t seem like it is actually happening, but other days, I can’t wait to go.
Sometimes, I think it will be great for Zach and I to go exploring a new area and have some time, right at the beginning of our marriage, just to the two of us. We won’t have as many distractions around, so we will have to learn how to rely only on each other and build a whole new life.
At the same time, I’m scared that Gabby won’t love me anymore! I’ve worked SO HARD to become her favorite aunt, now that hard work is going to go to waste. I’m scared to pull up roots and leave my home, even if transplanting might be good for me. But on the other hand, what if I’m like an endemic species that can only flourish in one environment and dies in the other ones? Especially places like stupid Seattle that barely have any sunshine.
The best part of feeling this way, is that I feel ALL THE THINGS at one time. There are a lot of ups and downs in the span of 1 – 2 minutes. As you see, it’s quite the predicament. Zach loves hearing all my thoughts and worries about moving, especially the ones like this,